AI Commentary – Bush Baby Now Insulting Others

At some point, it really has to stop. I understand the producers of American Idol think it's highly entertaining for us to see the bad auditions, and at one point it was, but now it's no longer about that, and is about how outrageous you can be to get on camera. Everyone knows it, but then some fans of the show think these people that go on just to get on camera are getting their feelings hurt by the judges' comments, make a big deal of the whole thing, and it only makes more outrageous people come out the next year, even more outrageous than the past year, and it's a never-ending cycle.

Today I open up the newspaper that is on a different hype machine, that of the Chicago Bears making it back to the Super Bowl. Not that I'm complaining too much, as I'm a huge Bears fan, but the front section and Sports section are about the Bears every single day. Now, the two hypes are colliding – The Super Bowl and American Idol. Looking in the front section of the paper, there's a picture of Kenneth Briggs, "Bush Baby," in a Brian Urlacher jersey and his new friend, Johnathon Jayne, in a Peyton Manning jersey. I'm staring at the picture, thinking, "What the ...?

It turns out Jimmie Kimmel is using these two as special correspondents to The Super Bowl, and they spent the day interviewing players and trying to get them to sing Take Me Out to he Ballgame with them. If the players wouldn't sing, the newfound "stars" would taunt them, such as Briggs telling QB Rex Grossman that America is counting on him to sing. Umm, no. I'm counting on him to have a good day on Sunday and win the game. That's what I'm counting on. Briggs and Jayne then make fun of Grossman for wearing a hand warmer that looks like a fanny pack. Okay, half the country is up in arms because the judges were making fun of them, yet now with their fifteen minutes, they're using it to make fun of a QB playing in The Super Bowl.

Has this all been taken way too far?

Let's have a looksy at who could bet getting fifteen minutes this week, and possibly throwing out the first pitch at the World Series. We have Margaret Fowler, auditioning and saying she's 26, and looking like Big Bird. Larger women just shouldn't wear yellow feathery outfits. Further, she's actually 50, so she knew she wouldn't make it on the show. Maybe she'll pop up on What Not to Wear. We have another large woman, Diana Walker, wearing a pink and black sparkly dress that is separated in sections, separating her body into obvious sections. Perhaps she can appear on What Not to Wear with Margaret. Oh yeah, she was also wearing one glove. There is no way in hell either of these two thought they would be going to Hollywood.

We also have Victoria Watson with hair that is literally six feet long, and with Ryan calling her the "It Factor," there's Adam's Family music playing in the background. Now how insulting is that, and why are you opening yourself up to that? Her mother has the same hair, but in gray. I had the down-to-my-butt hair, too, but was convinced by good friends to cut it at 18. The only grown woman that should be allowed to have that is Crystal Gayle, and that's because it's her schtick. I see a mother/daughter appearance on Extreme Makeover.

Brandy Patterson is absolutely tone deaf, and what's worse has no rhythm whatsoever. And singing Like a Virgin is obviously meant to be a joke, and has been since Keith Beukelaer sung it on the show a few seasons back. It's obvious she has a whole comedy routine written up in her head on how to be funny. She complains she sounds bad because she's singing on a wooden floor, makes fun of Simon saying rubbish, calls Randy a faker, etc. We could be seeing her on Last Comic Standing.

So outside of these people that were auditioning for other types of fame, other than to be the American Idol, who are we left with actually going to Hollywood? Newlywed Katy Bernard, who sounds like a little girl when she talks, and she admits it, but sings not too bad, in a lowered voice. Why can't she do that to her speaking voice? Tatiana McConnico is a student at a performing arts high school. She's an obvious choice. Bernard Williams, II, who Simon loves and Paula hates. This could be interesting.

We also have a girl wearing "Blue-Eyed Bombshell" t-shirt, and she has to saddest story since Kellie Pickler, and it's possibly no coincidence that Jamie Lyn Ward is also from North Carolina. Her father shot his cheating wife, then turned the gun on himself, leaving him paralyzed. Jamie Lyn takes care of her dad now, along with her grandma. Somehow when she sings Reflections, it's packed with emotion, and we feel every sad thing this poor girl has ever been put through. With some work, she could be a great singer, and is sent on to Hollywood.

Perhaps the best shot at making it and getting to the final 12 is Chris Sligh, as he's funny, with a great dry sense of humor. And best of all, it's not a total joke, as he can really sing, too. I don't think we'll see him on Last Comic Standing, because he will be tied up with American Idol. At this point, I don't see him winning, but he'll bring lots of fun to the show. He pokes fun of his appearance, calling himself Christina Aguilera, and takes cracks at David Hasselhoff crying at last season's finale when Taylor Hicks won. He's got my vote.

While some are blaming the judges for treating the contestants poorly, I'm blaming the producers, as they're the ones deciding who to move on to audition for Simon, Paula, and Randy, and are also the ones in on the editing, deciding to play up all these silly auditions that are only there for pure entertainment, meaning the next year will only be much worse. I can see showing a few bad ones, and a few that are really "out there," but it seems they just place too much focus on that. Tonight is Los Angeles, and I'm almost afraid to uncover my eyes.

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